Yine istemsizce sard\u0131 \u00e7ehremi h\u00fcz\u00fcn\u2026
\nNe yana d\u00f6nsem, ne tarafa gitsem b\u0131rakm\u0131yor zaten pe\u015fimi.
\n\u0130\u00e7im ac\u0131yor.
\nHele birde susmak zorunda olu\u015flar\u0131m\u2026<\/p>\n
Yan\u0131na var\u0131ncaya kadar ge\u00e7en zaman diliminde ki sab\u0131rs\u0131zl\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131n tarifi yok.
\nHele bekleyi\u015fler,
\nHeyecandan kar\u0131ncalanan karn\u0131m\u2026
\nVe sana do\u011fru att\u0131\u011f\u0131m her ad\u0131mda kalbimin bir \u00f6ncekine nazaran daha h\u0131zl\u0131 at\u0131\u015f\u0131\u2026<\/p>\n
\u00d6n\u00fcme konulan engeller sana ula\u015fmam\u0131 ne kadar zorla\u015ft\u0131rsa da hi\u00e7 bir \u00f6nemi yok asl\u0131nda. \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc sonunda seni g\u00f6rme ihtimali olmas\u0131 bile g\u00fc\u00e7 veriyor bana.<\/p>\n
Sonra etraf\u0131ma bak\u0131yorum ve derinden bir \u201cahhhhh!..\u201d \u00e7ekiyorum.. \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc yine susmak zorunda oldu\u011fum bir zaman dilimi\u2026
\nOlsun diyorum, olsun.
\nAz kald\u0131\u2026
\nB\u00f6yle avutmay\u0131nca kendimi zaman ge\u00e7miyor i\u015fte.
\nSensizli\u011fe al\u0131\u015fk\u0131n de\u011filim ki ben.
\nBunu d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnmek bile f\u0131rt\u0131nalar kopart\u0131yor i\u00e7imde.<\/p>\n
Ve i\u015fte son k\u00f6\u015feyi d\u00f6n\u00fcyorum\u2026
\nK\u00f6\u015feyi d\u00f6nd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcmde seni g\u00f6rme d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcncesi nefessiz b\u0131rak\u0131yor beni.
\nHay\u0131r anlatam\u0131yorum ki bu \u00f6zlemi\u2026
\nHangi kelime hangi s\u00f6z tarif edebilir?
\nSenin i\u00e7imi \u0131s\u0131tan o g\u00fcl\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fc g\u00f6rd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcmde ki an\u0131n tarifi olamaz mesela\u2026<\/p>\n
Bir solukta g\u00f6r\u00fc\u015f\u00fcp oturuyoruz. \u00d6yle uzun uzad\u0131ya sar\u0131lmaya f\u0131rsat\u0131m\u0131z da yok. Zaten biz \u00f6yle sar\u0131lmay\u0131 da \u00e7ok sevmeyiz. Sevgi g\u00f6stergelerimiz farkl\u0131d\u0131r\u2026
\nHani derdin ya:
\n\u201cBeni hep uzakta iken mi seviyorsun ?\u201d
\nAsl\u0131nda bende bilmiyorum bu sorunun cevab\u0131n\u0131. San\u0131r\u0131m insan \u00f6zleyince, uzak kal\u0131nca daha bir seviyor, d\u00fc\u015fk\u00fcn oluyor, k\u0131ymet biliyor. Ne bileyim\u2026<\/p>\n
Bazen yan yana bazen de kar\u015f\u0131l\u0131kl\u0131 oturuyoruz. Bak\u0131yorum ona. \u00c7evremdeki t\u00fcm ye\u015filliklere, g\u00fczelliklere nazar eden g\u00f6zlerim ile bak\u0131yorum. Bir s\u00fcre oturuyoruz sonra fark ediyorum ki ben hi\u00e7 konu\u015fmam\u0131\u015f\u0131m\u2026
\nOnu dinlemeyi bile ne kadar \u00f6zledi\u011fimi var\u0131n siz d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcn.<\/p>\n
Ve ayr\u0131l\u0131k vakti\u2026
\nBiraz daha kalay\u0131m ne olacak derken, \u201colsun \u015fimdi k\u0131zarlar\u201d deyi\u015flerin\u2026
\nZaman, ahh bu zaman\u2026
\nNe k\u0131ymetli ne de\u011ferli\u2026
\nSaniyeler, saliseler\u2026
\nD\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcyorum da, asl\u0131nda hayat hep beklemeler ve ayr\u0131l\u0131klar \u00fczerine kurulu.
\nHer do\u011fu\u015f bir bekleyi\u015f iken her \u00f6l\u00fcm bir ayr\u0131l\u0131\u015f\u2026
\nAma biz bunun ne kadar fark\u0131nday\u0131z?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Yine istemsizce sard\u0131 \u00e7ehremi h\u00fcz\u00fcn\u2026 Ne…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":65,"featured_media":8422,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[67,53],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.kadrandergi.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8180"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.kadrandergi.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.kadrandergi.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.kadrandergi.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/65"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.kadrandergi.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=8180"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.kadrandergi.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8180\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.kadrandergi.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=\/"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.kadrandergi.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=8180"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.kadrandergi.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=8180"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.kadrandergi.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=8180"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}