Cam\u0131 aralad\u0131m. Zemheri so\u011fuk. Aral\u0131k ay\u0131n\u0131n yak\u0131c\u0131 so\u011fu\u011funa inat, \u0131l\u0131k \u0131l\u0131k ya\u011fan tanelere uzatt\u0131m elimi. So\u011fuk derimi \u00e7izse de kendimi al\u0131koyamad\u0131m tenimi ok\u015fayan rahmet tanelerinden. Kupkuru ellerini semaya yalvar\u0131rcas\u0131na kald\u0131rm\u0131\u015f olan \u00e7\u0131plak a\u011fac\u0131 seyrettim sonra. Hayatta kimsesi kalmam\u0131\u015f, ya\u015fad\u0131\u011f\u0131 t\u00fcm zorluklara ra\u011fmen belini dik tutmaya \u00e7al\u0131\u015fan bir ya\u015fl\u0131 gibiydi sanki. Ne g\u00f6lgesinde serinleyen insanlar, ne g\u00f6vdesine sevdas\u0131n\u0131 kaz\u0131yan gen\u00e7 a\u015f\u0131klar, ne dallar\u0131na t\u0131rmanan ha\u015far\u0131 o\u011flan \u00e7ocuklar\u0131 ne de yavrular\u0131na yemek ta\u015f\u0131yan anne ku\u015f vard\u0131 yan\u0131nda. \u00d6nce yapraklar\u0131 terk etmi\u015fti onu. Birer birer kendilerini r\u00fczgar\u0131n kollar\u0131na b\u0131rak\u0131p topra\u011fa kar\u0131\u015fmay\u0131 se\u00e7mi\u015flerdi. Sonra g\u00f6lgesinin m\u00fcdavimleri gitmi\u015fti. Ha\u015far\u0131 o\u011flanlar u\u011framaz olmu\u015flar, anne ku\u015f ise tutunacak yer bulamay\u0131nca yavrular\u0131n\u0131 da al\u0131p arkas\u0131na bile bakmadan kanat \u00e7\u0131rpm\u0131\u015ft\u0131 uzakl\u0131\u011fa. Dostlard\u0131 anne ku\u015fla a\u011fa\u00e7. Ona ba\u011fr\u0131n\u0131 a\u00e7m\u0131\u015ft\u0131. Yapraklar\u0131n\u0131 \u00f6rt\u00fc yapm\u0131\u015ft\u0131 onun ve yavrular\u0131n\u0131n \u00fczerine. Oysa \u015fimdilerde unutulmu\u015f oldu\u011funu g\u00f6rd\u00fc. Yaln\u0131zl\u0131\u011f\u0131 k\u00f6klerinde hissetti. H\u00fcz\u00fcnle sars\u0131ld\u0131 ya\u015fl\u0131 a\u011fa\u00e7. Biliyordu ki bir g\u00fcn tekrar nazenin pembe \u00e7i\u00e7eklerine kavu\u015facakt\u0131. Ama g\u00f6lgesinin m\u00fcdavimleri, sonra ha\u015far\u0131 o\u011flanlar geri gelirler miydi? Yine kaz\u0131n\u0131r m\u0131yd\u0131 g\u00f6vdesine sevdalar? Ya anne ku\u015f? Yine s\u0131rt\u0131n\u0131 yaslar m\u0131yd\u0131 dallar\u0131na?<\/p>\n
Aniden esen hoyrat r\u00fczgarla dallar\u0131n\u0131 silkeledi ya\u015fl\u0131 a\u011fa\u00e7 omuz silkeler gibi. Bense geri \u00e7ektim elimi r\u00fczgar\u0131n \u015fiddetinden.<\/p>\n
Sonra bir ya\u015fl\u0131 a\u011fac\u0131 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnd\u00fcm bir de kendimi. Onun yapraklar\u0131 gibi benim de hayallerim savrulmu\u015ftu. Onun g\u00f6lgesinin m\u00fcdavimleri yoktu benimse beklentilerim. Onu ismi g\u00f6vdesine kaz\u0131l\u0131 gen\u00e7 a\u015f\u0131klar\u0131 terk etmi\u015fti, beni ise ismi g\u00f6nl\u00fcme yaz\u0131l\u0131 sevdiklerim. Onun art\u0131k anne ku\u015fu yoktu, benimse umutlar\u0131m.<\/p>\n
Ama her \u015feye ra\u011fmen biliyordu ya\u015fl\u0131 a\u011fa\u00e7, her bahar oldu\u011fu gibi bu bahar da dallar\u0131n\u0131n ilk yaz \u00e7i\u00e7ekleriyle donanaca\u011f\u0131n\u0131. O a\u015f\u0131klar\u0131n yerine bir ba\u015fkalar\u0131n\u0131n gelece\u011fini, anne ku\u015f geri gelmese de bir ba\u015fka ku\u015fun gelece\u011finden emindi. Ha\u015far\u0131 o\u011flanlarsa asla bitmezlerdi.<\/p>\n
Biliyordu \u00e7\u00fcnk\u00fc hayatta sevgi, hayaller, beklentiler ve umutlar asla t\u00fckenmezdi.<\/p>\n
Ya ben? Hayallerini, beklentilerini, sevdiklerini kaybetmi\u015f benim umudum var m\u0131yd\u0131? Vard\u0131ysa neredeydi?<\/p>\n
U\u00e7up gitmi\u015f i\u015fte dedim kendi kendime. Hem de arkas\u0131na bile bakmam\u0131\u015f. Ama ya\u015fl\u0131 a\u011fa\u00e7 o ku\u015fun yerine bir ba\u015fkas\u0131n\u0131n gelece\u011fini biliyordu, yine ye\u015ferece\u011fini, yine herkesin u\u011frak mekan\u0131 olaca\u011f\u0131n\u0131 biliyordu madem, onun umudu yerindeydi benim neden olmas\u0131nd\u0131?<\/p>\n
O a\u011fac\u0131 dahi unutmayan, yeniden hayat bah\u015feden beni unutur muydu?<\/p>\n
Cevab\u0131 zaten biliyordum.<\/p>\n
Peki ya sen sevgili okur? Umudunu kaybetmi\u015f sen?<\/p>\n
Biliyorum \u00e7ok yorgunsun. Bu hasretler bitmez, y\u00fcre\u011finin s\u0131z\u0131s\u0131 ge\u00e7mez san\u0131yorsun.<\/p>\n
Ama inan bana o gen\u00e7 a\u015f\u0131klar o a\u011faca geri geldi, yine g\u00f6lgesine s\u0131\u011f\u0131nd\u0131 herkes, ha\u015far\u0131 o\u011flanlar yine a\u015f\u0131rd\u0131 meyvelerini dallar\u0131ndan ve bir anne ku\u015f yine geldi dayad\u0131 s\u0131rt\u0131n\u0131 ya\u015fl\u0131 \u00e7\u0131nara\u2026<\/p>\n
Sen yeter ki g\u00f6nl\u00fcnden eksik etme nazenin umut \u00e7i\u00e7eklerini…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Cam\u0131 aralad\u0131m. Zemheri so\u011fuk. Aral\u0131k ay\u0131n\u0131n…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":54,"featured_media":7783,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[69,53],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.kadrandergi.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7780"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.kadrandergi.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.kadrandergi.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.kadrandergi.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/54"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.kadrandergi.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=7780"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.kadrandergi.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7780\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.kadrandergi.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=\/"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.kadrandergi.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=7780"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.kadrandergi.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=7780"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.kadrandergi.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=7780"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}