{"id":7464,"date":"2017-11-01T23:47:41","date_gmt":"2017-11-01T21:47:41","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/kadrandergi.com.tr\/?p=7464"},"modified":"2017-11-01T23:47:41","modified_gmt":"2017-11-01T21:47:41","slug":"azize","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.kadrandergi.com.tr\/?p=7464","title":{"rendered":"AZ\u0130ZE"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Nerden buldun beni Azize, hangi karanl\u0131k uykudan hangi derin r\u00fcyaya uyand\u0131rd\u0131n? Gizlendi\u011fim bu karanl\u0131k kuyuya nas\u0131l \u0131\u015f\u0131k tuttu g\u00f6zlerin?<\/p>\n<p>Oysa ben ceplerime doldurdu\u011fum yaln\u0131zl\u0131\u011f\u0131 al\u0131r ka\u00e7ard\u0131m ya\u015famaktan ve buzda\u011f\u0131n\u0131n g\u00f6lgesinde al\u0131rd\u0131m cephemi.<\/p>\n<p>\u015eimdilerde ne \u00e7ok yelken a\u00e7\u0131yorsun d\u00fc\u015flerime, ne \u00e7ok bayrak dikiyorsun bur\u00e7lar\u0131ma\u2026<\/p>\n<p>S\u0131z\u0131 diyorum Azize. Bir garip s\u0131z\u0131 b\u0131rak\u0131yorsun ruhuma. Sineme \u00e7ekiyorum s\u0131z\u0131n\u0131. Ahhh o g\u00f6ky\u00fcz\u00fcne vurulmu\u015flu\u011fun, \u00e7ok eski bir hasrettir biliyorum. Ben hep s\u0131r\u0131ls\u0131klam gezerdim \u00e7elikten ya\u011fmurun alt\u0131nda, bunu da biliyorum, bu da \u00e7ok eski bir hasrettir. Bak\u0131\u015flar\u0131n\u0131 sunard\u0131n kalbime &#8220;Allah\u2019\u0131m bu nas\u0131l bir imtihan?&#8221; deyi\u015fim gelirdi zihnime ve ben daha \u00e7ok \u0131slan\u0131rd\u0131m. Geceleri bile pe\u015fimi b\u0131rakmayan g\u00f6lgemle ar\u015f\u0131nlarken sokaklar\u0131 her k\u00f6\u015fede hayalinle kucakla\u015f\u0131rd\u0131m. Sen bilmezsin belki Azize burada ya\u015famak tekrar tekrar \u00f6l\u00fcme hasret kalmakt\u0131r. Her u\u00e7an ku\u015fla selam g\u00f6nderirdim, sen bunu da bilmezdin.<\/p>\n<p>Akl\u0131m d\u00f6n\u00fcp d\u00f6n\u00fcp g\u00f6zlerine tak\u0131l\u0131yor. Ahh bu benim ak\u0131ls\u0131zl\u0131\u011f\u0131m, ak\u0131ldan yoksun akl\u0131m. Bir mezardan bir ba\u015fka mezara gidiyorum. \u00d6l\u00fcm\u00fcn bu h\u00fck\u00fcm s\u00fcrd\u00fc\u011f\u00fc topraklardaki kimliksizli\u011fim nedendir bilmem.<\/p>\n<p>Bu kirli kalabal\u0131ktan hayalini kurtarabildim sadece Azize. Ellerim hayaline mi sar\u0131ls\u0131n hayata m\u0131, hayat \u015furda dursun ellerin&#8230; ellerin&#8230; ve yine ellerin. D\u00fcnya ellerin kadar, cennet ise g\u00f6zlerin kadard\u0131. Ahh o d\u00fcnyadan ve o cennetten mahrum kalbim ne zaman uslanacak bunu da bilmezdim, bunu da bilmezdin. \u00d6l\u00fcm\u00fc \u00f6n\u00fcme \u00e7eken saat haydi biraz daha h\u0131zlan, d\u00fcnya cephesinde kur\u015funsuzum.<\/p>\n<p>Hadi bitir bu sava\u015f\u0131, yorgunum.<\/p>\n<p>Kalbimi g\u00f6md\u00fc\u011f\u00fcm bu topraklarda nereden \u00e7\u0131kt\u0131n kar\u015f\u0131ma Azize?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Nerden buldun beni Azize, hangi karanl\u0131k&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":24,"featured_media":7532,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[67,53],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.kadrandergi.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7464"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.kadrandergi.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.kadrandergi.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.kadrandergi.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/24"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.kadrandergi.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=7464"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.kadrandergi.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7464\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.kadrandergi.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=\/"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.kadrandergi.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=7464"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.kadrandergi.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=7464"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.kadrandergi.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=7464"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}