{"id":11124,"date":"2021-09-01T01:16:36","date_gmt":"2021-08-31T22:16:36","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/kadrandergi.com.tr\/?p=11124"},"modified":"2021-09-01T01:16:36","modified_gmt":"2021-08-31T22:16:36","slug":"marguerite-yourcenar-bir-olum-bagislamak-oldur-beni-sevgili","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.kadrandergi.com.tr\/?p=11124","title":{"rendered":"Marguerite Yourcenar\/Bir \u00d6l\u00fcm Ba\u011f\u0131\u015flamak\/\u00d6ld\u00fcr Beni Sevgili"},"content":{"rendered":"

“Kimi yeterince sevmez kimi fazla sever
\nKimi satar; kimi de sat\u0131n al\u0131r
\nKimi g\u00f6zya\u015f\u0131 d\u00f6ker \u00f6ld\u00fcr\u00fcrken
\nKimi k\u0131l\u0131 k\u0131p\u0131rdamadan
\n\u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc herkes \u00f6ld\u00fcr\u00fcr sevdi\u011fini
\nAma herkes \u00f6ld\u00fcrd\u00fc diye \u00f6lmez.”
\nOscar Wilde <\/em><\/p>\n

Bol\u015fevik Devrimi y\u0131llar\u0131 Litvanyas\u0131. K\u0131z\u0131llar ve Beyazlar\u0131n amans\u0131z m\u00fccadelesinin ortas\u0131nda kararg\u00e2ha d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015fm\u00fc\u015f bir \u015fato. \u0130ki erkek subay, bir k\u0131z karde\u015f ve amans\u0131z a\u015f\u0131k. Eric, Sophie ve Conrad’\u0131n a\u015fk, arkada\u015fl\u0131k \u00fc\u00e7geni. Bir uzun \u00f6yk\u00fc, belki k\u0131sa roman demeliyim. (1939) Bir klasik tragedya; Frans\u0131z yazar\u0131n kaleminden d\u00f6k\u00fclen… Sadece 96 sayfa olmas\u0131 yan\u0131ltmas\u0131n zira yazar\u0131n uzun c\u00fcmlelerinin bir miktar yormas\u0131 olas\u0131. H\u00fcr Yumer’in ba\u015far\u0131l\u0131 \u00e7evirisiyle anlam sorunuyla ba\u015f etmek zorunda kalm\u0131yoruz neyse ki. Alman y\u00f6netmen Volker Schl\u00f6ndorff, \u201cCoup de Grace\u201d ad\u0131yla 1976’da beyaz perdeye yans\u0131t\u0131r, ger\u00e7ek ya\u015famdan al\u0131nt\u0131lanan bu \u00f6yk\u00fcy\u00fc. B\u00f6ylece katmerlenir eserin \u00f6l\u00fcms\u00fczl\u00fc\u011f\u00fc.
\nA\u015fk\u0131nda kabul g\u00f6rmeyi bekleyen bir kad\u0131n; itinayla bu a\u015fktan geri duran belki a\u015fk\u0131 yenilgi gibi g\u00f6ren bu y\u00fczden de tutkusunu ba\u015far\u0131yla dizginleyen bir adam. Eric’in dilinden dinliyoruz Sophie’nin a\u015fk\u0131n\u0131, \u00e7abas\u0131n\u0131. Elini uzatsa dokunabilecekken ate\u015ften bir kor muamelesi yapt\u0131\u011f\u0131 gen\u00e7 k\u0131z\u0131n ac\u0131nas\u0131 a\u015f\u0131r\u0131l\u0131klar\u0131, g\u00f6stermekten \u00e7ekinmedi\u011fi zay\u0131fl\u0131klar\u0131 yine g\u00f6n\u00fcl muhatab\u0131n\u0131n dilinden… \u0130\u00e7 sava\u015f\u0131n \u00e7alkant\u0131l\u0131 atmosferine k\u0131rm\u0131z\u0131 bir fon gibi bu dokunulmaz a\u015fk; ger\u00e7ek bir tinsel karma\u015fa ayn\u0131 zamanda… Hem ruhu hem de bedeniyle kendini a\u015fk\u0131na haz\u0131rlayan k\u0131z ile arzu etti\u011fi kar\u015f\u0131l\u0131\u011f\u0131 ona veremeyen hatta yan \u00e7izen delikanl\u0131 hik\u00e2yesi gibi s\u0131\u011f d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnmek b\u00fcy\u00fck haks\u0131zl\u0131k olur esere. Her \u015feyden \u00f6nce ayn\u0131 tehlikelere, ayn\u0131 yoksulluk ve yoksunluklara katlanan bu \u00fc\u00e7 insan aras\u0131ndaki nitelik ortakl\u0131\u011f\u0131na odaklanmal\u0131 belki. En m\u00fchimi Conrad’a dair Eric’in y\u00fcce arkada\u015fl\u0131k d\u00fc\u015fleminin, erotikas\u0131n\u0131 disiplininin adeta bir cephesine d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015ft\u00fcrmesi.<\/p>\n

\u201cDostluk, her \u015feyden \u00f6nce, kesin g\u00fcven duymakt\u0131r; onu a\u015fktan ay\u0131ran budur. Ayn\u0131 zamanda sayg\u0131d\u0131r; ba\u015fka bir varl\u0131\u011f\u0131n b\u00fct\u00fcn her \u015feyiyle kabul edilmesidir.\u201d<\/p>\n

<\/em>Sona gelindi\u011finde farkl\u0131 politik cephelerde; tensel tutku, tatmin bulmam\u0131\u015f arzu ya da k\u0131r\u0131lm\u0131\u015f gurur kal\u0131nt\u0131lar\u0131ndan \u00e7ok daha g\u00fc\u00e7l\u00fc bir benzerlik ve i\u00e7tenlik vard\u0131r art\u0131k bak\u0131\u015flarda. Bu noktada \u00f6ld\u00fcrenin ya da \u00f6ld\u00fcrenin birbirinden fark\u0131 yoktur. \u00d6l\u00fcm\u00fcn de kal\u0131mdan… Hatta art\u0131k aradaki duygunun nefret mi yoksa sevgi mi oldu\u011funun da. Namlunun ucunda topyek\u00fcn varolu\u015f vard\u0131r bunda sonra.<\/p>\n

\u201cBir Alman balad\u0131, \u00f6l\u00fcler tez gider der ama ya\u015fayanlar da \u00f6yle.\u201d
\n<\/em>
\nCinsel gerilim ve \u00e7at\u0131\u015fman\u0131n Eric’in a\u011fz\u0131ndan ustaca ve en az duru\u015fu kadar -mesafeli- anlat\u0131ld\u0131\u011f\u0131 bu k\u0131sa roman, bilhassa Sophie ve Eric’in psikolojilerini incelikle analiz etmesi ve kar\u015f\u0131l\u0131\u011f\u0131 verilen\/verilmeyen tutkular\u0131n yol a\u00e7abilece\u011fi tahribat \u00fczerine olduk\u00e7a \u00f6nemlidir.<\/p>\n

\u201cZalimlik, uyu\u015fturucularla ipek g\u00f6mlekler gibi i\u015fi g\u00fcc\u00fc olmayan adamlar\u0131n l\u00fcks\u00fcd\u00fcr. A\u015fk konusunda da s\u00fcss\u00fcz bir kusursuzluk yanl\u0131s\u0131y\u0131m.\u201d
\n<\/em>
\nBelki Eric hakl\u0131d\u0131r; zordur bir devrimin ortas\u0131nda kendi sava\u015f\u0131na se\u011firtmek. Sevmek rahat zamanlar\u0131n i\u015fidir belki; pervas\u0131zca dokunmak, doludizgin sevi\u015fmek…
\nHerkes \u00f6ld\u00fcr\u00fcr sevdi\u011fini. Bir \u00f6m\u00fcr boyu birlikte diyerek belki… Bilin\u00e7li ya da fark etmeksizin… Ba\u015fka birine d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015ft\u00fcrerek \u00f6ld\u00fcr\u00fcr. Anne babalar \u00e7ocuklar\u0131n\u0131… Adamlar kad\u0131nlar\u0131n\u0131, kad\u0131nlar adamlar\u0131n\u0131 \u00f6ld\u00fcr\u00fcr. Yazar elinde kalemiyle s\u00f6zc\u00fckleri \u00f6ld\u00fcr\u00fcr. Kopar\u0131r \u00e7i\u00e7ekleri vazoya doldurur, renkleri \u00f6ld\u00fcr\u00fcr. Dokuna ok\u015faya tenleri \u00f6ld\u00fcr\u00fcr. Bir yudum \u015farapla lezzeti \u00f6ld\u00fcr\u00fcr. \u015eeffafla\u015ft\u0131k\u00e7a bulan\u0131kla\u015fan hazz\u0131 \u00f6ld\u00fcr\u00fcr. Ars\u0131z kahkahalarla a\u015fk\u0131 \u00f6ld\u00fcr\u00fcr.<\/p>\n

Sevdi\u011fi taraf\u0131ndan \u00f6ld\u00fcr\u00fclenler var bir de…\u00a0 Gri bir bulut gibi bakar onlar\u0131n g\u00f6zleri. Bir kara delik ta\u015f\u0131rlar solunda g\u00f6\u011f\u00fcslerinin. Ellerinden yaln\u0131zl\u0131k f\u0131\u015fk\u0131r\u0131r, cesetlerinden kah\u0131r damlar yerlere. Ayaklar\u0131 avare gider, bilmezler. Gittikleri yerlerde tan\u0131d\u0131k tek bir y\u00fcz istemezler. Bilinmeyen \u0131ss\u0131z yerleri \u00e7eker canlar\u0131. Kalabal\u0131klar dikenli teldir, i\u011fneli kemer. Ac\u0131yan g\u00f6zler vard\u0131r\u00a0 kur\u015funa dizildikleri meydanlarda… S\u00f6ylemek istedikleri bir avu\u00e7 a\u011fu olur, t\u0131kan\u0131r kursaklara. Kimsenin duyamayaca\u011f\u0131 bir \u00e7\u0131\u011fl\u0131k vard\u0131r orada. Zaten kimse de duysun istemezler; yeniden \u00f6lmeyi kald\u0131ramayacaklar\u0131n\u0131 bildiklerinden…<\/p>\n

“\u0130nanma istersen y\u0131ld\u0131zlar\u0131n yand\u0131\u011f\u0131na,
\nG\u00fcne\u015fin d\u00f6nd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcne inanma,
\nDo\u011frunun ta kendisini yalan bil,
\nAma seni sevdi\u011fime inan Ophelia…”
\nShakespeare\/Hamlet
\n<\/em>
\nBir \u00f6l\u00fcm ba\u011f\u0131\u015fla bana sevgili, g\u00f6k gibi masmavi bir \u00f6l\u00fcm. \u00d6ld\u00fcr beni sevgili, g\u00f6rd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcm son y\u00fcz senin olsun…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

“Kimi yeterince sevmez kimi fazla sever…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":288,"featured_media":11125,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[62],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.kadrandergi.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11124"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.kadrandergi.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.kadrandergi.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.kadrandergi.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/288"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.kadrandergi.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=11124"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.kadrandergi.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11124\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.kadrandergi.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=\/"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.kadrandergi.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=11124"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.kadrandergi.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=11124"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.kadrandergi.com.tr\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=11124"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}